Bombay Blues

Part I

Historically Unpleasant

But I refuse to go aloneIts a metropolitan mom!!! Tell dad, I mean I need moral support on this one, do you realize these entrance exams are the most important everTISS MOM!!! Its a question of life and death I tried it all, but dad wouldnt budge and mom thought Id be better off doing Vipasana in Rishikesh for ten days. The way dad saw it, Teenu you can handle this on your own, youre always asking for independence go ahead aaah, the ego trick. Clever.

This was really not what I wanted. My last trip to Bombay was a weeklong stay with the Siddiquis, during Ramzaan. They lived in Lokhandwala in a building which was home to Jaspal Bhatti and his family, it was not unusual to spot a group of young sardar boys playing table tennis in the basement Junior Bhattis said Junior Siddiqui, who took it upon himself to show mom and me the city.

Since the Siddiquis owned a production house in Bombay, they were pretty cushy with most of the film fraternity and this did not enamor mom or me much but we silently put up with the torture of hearing what Salman actually looked like, what Shahrukh liked to eat etc. After a week of sight seeing with sudden woh dekho Shilpa Shetty ka ghar!! kind of exclamations from our guide (who ignored my mothers frowns and my guffaws) we finally visited marine drive, that long stretch of concrete overlooking the vast oceandrank dhaap, saluted The Gateway of India, visited Essel World, enjoyed fresh black currant ice cream and cheese-tomato paav-bhaaji and did every touristy thing possible

But I didnt like it. No, I didnt like the beaches and I hated the bhelpuri. Bombay wasnt fun, not for someone who missed her dogs and farm back home. Bombay was where Id mistaken a BEST bus for a fire engine, (it was BIG and RED!!) where my contact with fauna was restricted to stinky grey pigeons and fish in extra large aquariumsthe Siddiquis had a pet white rabbit named Chunnu and he was not half as loving or pretty as my black and white rabbit Matilda who was probably missing me back home.

Everything about Bombay repulsed me I swore Id never return to this sorry excuse for a city and no matter how much Nikhil Mahajan tried to change my mind about this city he loved, I refused to let him.